Act- 1 ( Scene1 & 2)

Premise:
Before the Border - Gavaskar Trophy ‘08 began, everyone hailed Mr. Ponting as Captain Wonder - A captain who could do no wrong… An unflappable captain… Captain of the mighty Australian cricket team.
Ponting had lofty visions of overpowering India on their own soil. He had, at his beck and call, a troop of dedicated soldiers who, he knew as everyone else did, would risk their own lives at his command.

Scene 1:
In a secluded apartment on the outskirts of Sydney.

James (Not Bond but Sutherland obviously): "Go my tigers! Make our nation proud. And, captain - I am counting on you to lead your team well!"

Ponting: "Aye! Aye! Boss."

Team enthusiastically: "Aye! Aye!"

Ponting gives a stern look to his mates, which gets everyone to shut up.

Clarke (2nd in Command): "What about Roy, Sir? Ain’t he done with his fishing? He can hit those mighty sixes and moreover he can easily step on Turbanator’s nerve."

Sound: "Thhpwach! Thhpwach! Thhpwach! Thhpwach!"

Lee boy (strumming his guitar starts to croon): "Somebody’s shooting at us…! I bet it’s the Turbanator. An air rifle in his hands… Doing that bhangra dance…”

Ponting: "Shut up you moron. Stop singing. And by the way, it doesn’t rhyme at all. That ugly wretch! I am going to kill him once and for all."

Ponting jumps of his chair and yanks open the window only to find Roy standing outside frantically waving and gesturing.

Roy: "O Captain. My Captain! It’s me, Roy. Small fish don’t excite me any more! I want to bait sharks - those Indians I mean."

James (straining his neck, and putting his head out of the window): "Well boy! Go fish! Your time ain’t come yet!"

James Sutherland closes the window and pulls down the curtain.

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Scene 2:
Hotel room, Jaipur. Team Meeting.

Greg (Anti-Ganguly) Chappell: "… As I have been saying, irritate those Indians. Get on their nerves. They can handle all Lees and Clarks but not this."

Pointing: "But, this time we are prepared for the Indian tracks. We have two good spinners in our team - McGain and Kretjza"

Greg (looking very confused): "McCain? I thought he was American. Ain’t he too old for this stuff? Why is he here? Is he not contesting US Elections?"

Matty Hayden (looking at captain Ponting): "Permission to speak, Sir!"

Ponting nods.

Matty: "It’s McGain Sir! No McCain. BTW, I am supporting McCain. His deputy, Palin, does look a piece of art. And as you all know; I am such a piece of art myself."

Matty rolls his sleeves up and flexes his muscles proudly.

Greg: "Oh! I see. Where is he?"

Kretjza (aka Crazy): "Permission to speak, Sir!"

Ponting nods again.

Kretjza: "He is in his room watching videos of Warney getting the thrashing of his life by the Indians. He does seem a bit uncomfortable with the idea of bowling against the Indian greats. "

"May I play? Please." Kretjza asks earnestly.

Tim Nielsen (coach) stares at Kretjza with a - ‘Are you crazy or what?’ look.

"O Lord! Please get me to play. I want to play… Please Lord! Pleaseeee" Kretjza prays silently to God.

Little did Kretjza know that God was listening to his prayers. Had he had known, he would have asked for the grand Rolls-Royce that he has always wanted. But, as he prayed for it, he got to play the first tour match.
McGain, the Aussie premier spinner, was ruled out of the series due to a shoulder injury.

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To be continued…

Cheers,
Roshan